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Who is an enabler?

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  5. Who is an enabler?
Asked: 2018-06-19 11:03:46
My boyfriend called me an enabler because I don’t insist that my best friend get help for her cocaine addiction. In my eyes, it’s up to her to make the call, and I don’t encourage her to use cocaine, either. What do you think?


Answered: 2018-06-20 09:42:53

I would say an enabler is more someone who actively encourages and supports someone’s self-destructive choices. I don’t think you are necessarily condoning her drug use and you certainly aren’t putting the drugs in your hand, but your boyfriend probably thinks you could be doing more to stop her. Unfortunately, it’s really hard to force someone to get help unless they want to.


Answered: 2018-06-21 08:10:04

An enabler is someone who encourages another person’s self-destructive behavior. Typically with drug use, that is a friend or loved one who buys drugs or takes drugs with the other person. I wouldn’t call you an enabler, because you say you don’t encourage her to use the drug. I think your boyfriend’s point is more that you aren’t actively urging her to seek help. It’s a tough call because she also has to be willing to go through the recovery process.

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